How hairy is too hairy...to go outside that is the question.

It is a question that occured to me at work a few days ago when I, out and about and about my lawn care duties. I pulled up to one lawn and began to lawn care away. When suddenly when I heard a friendly sound from the opposite side of the yard. It was the owner of the lawn, with queations no doubt,  I thought as I  put on my best smile, took a deep breath and looked to where the voice came from.

The site that greeted me nearly knocked me down. What I saw was not a man at al. It was a patch of hair with arms legs and eyes. It was the Incredible Hulk of hairy chia pets. The dude was shirtless and so hairy, I nearly called 911 to report  a sasquatch sighting. The site hit me like a ton of hairy bricks. and nearly left me speechless.

 I mean this guy was a forest of  black and gray hair two or three inches high. and for a minute I thought he was being attacked by thousands of huge  hairy spiders or was in the process of turning into a middle aged Jewish werewolf,. I was speechless for several moments but soon caught my breath and managed to politely continue on my duties and bid the customer a friendly good day.

Now as a fairly enlightened man from a gene pool full of hairy guys I think this episode brings to mind a question that must be answered. 

How hairy is too hairy to go outside shirtless???? At what point does freedom of expression give way to aesthetic concerns. Is ordinary middle aged hairiness sufficient to prevent going without shirt. or does one have to look like a salt and pepper  abomidable snowman to be forbidden to go shirtless.

 The importance of this question is oobvious and as all real men are hairy to a certain extent it is a question that must be answered. Normally I would always favor freedom of choice over any such concerns but people shouldn't  look like lint balls when others are trying to work.

i am not without sympathy for the hairy. Hey a guy wants to relaxe when he is home and sometimes going without a shirt. Many of the men in my family are hairy. They are so hairy that the Air Force had considered using some of them as antiaircraft weapons. They said all they had to do was build a big crane to roll one of them across a giant ballon and the static electricity would bring down ballistic missles. for miles. This guy made my relatives look like a hairless surfer male model and we need to do something about.  It takes a lot for a guy to be so ugly that he repels other guys by taking his shirt off but this guy found a way. Call the state legislature. Do something ....